Oh! How simple to just write the dialogue with full stops instead. Why, that never occurred to me! (She laughed :)
I think I'll make that change :)
As for Draco sitting next to him, I'm torn. Because you're totally right about the trouser thing, but for some reason I liked him sitting across from Harry because it would be easier for Harry to stare at him that way, without necessarily being obvious about it. This is something I'm going to have to think about.
(As an aside: It's really rather fascinating how every little decision you make in a fic has all these consequences! I'm really enjoying getting this feedback from you and getting to think critically about writing)
Maybe other people will chime in and let me know if the trouser thing is enough of an issue that I should just move Draco one seat over! I am definitely willing to bow to the masses on this one.
no subject
I think I'll make that change :)
As for Draco sitting next to him, I'm torn. Because you're totally right about the trouser thing, but for some reason I liked him sitting across from Harry because it would be easier for Harry to stare at him that way, without necessarily being obvious about it. This is something I'm going to have to think about.
(As an aside: It's really rather fascinating how every little decision you make in a fic has all these consequences! I'm really enjoying getting this feedback from you and getting to think critically about writing)
Maybe other people will chime in and let me know if the trouser thing is enough of an issue that I should just move Draco one seat over! I am definitely willing to bow to the masses on this one.