Fic: All In, Draco/Harry, PG-13

[snowgall]

Figured I might as well post this link to my LJ for posterity. My first (and most likely last!) fic :)

Title: All In (or on LJ)
Author: snowgall
Pairing: Draco/Harry
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 427
Summary: Draco introduces Harry to strip poker
Warnings: Unbetaed*; misuse of British-isms by an American; scanty knowledge of poker
Notes: Written for Draco's Kinks and Tropes Party July 10, 2015 for the prompt "Draco introduces Harry to strip poker" by indyonblue

*Concrit is welcome for this. Seriously, this is a first fic and I have no delusions that it is a masterpiece or anything. I would really love to know how to get the dialogue to flow better (the way Draco talks about betting their clothes still doesn't really work for me, honestly), how to make the setting more clear, how to get their thoughts across non-clumsily, all of it, basically. You can send me a PM if you like, or comment below, and my feelings won't be hurt at all. I've already gotten more nice and sweet comments on this than I expected, so I don't need to be coddled. Oh, and if I got any British-isms wrong I definitely want to know! Like, does it make sense for Draco to say "What I am interested in, is seeing what Harry Potter looks like under his kit" ? Is that the right way to use "kit" or did I flub it? Using language right is really important to me, so please do tell me if something is off.

Comments

[snowgall]

Oh I like the idea of him tipping back in his chair! That does seem both in character and helpful to the scene. I will think about working that in!

And given the input from both you and birds, I've changed the last line back now. Honestly, I'm too close to it, and I can't judge it with any impartiality or even see it clearly. It's like when you say a word over and over again and it starts to sound odd. I've looked at this line so many times now that I have no idea what it really looks or sounds like anymore :) So I'll just go with the majority for now. Maybe I'll change it back every week :)

And yeah, personal preferences and peeves for dialogue tags and such is so very idiosyncratic and hard to figure out. Obviously I'm OK with using "laughs" the way I did, but I can also see Vaysh's point, and I'm sure many other people feel the same way. It's hard to be sure what to do!

But thank you so much for the feedback. It really means a lot to me that people have taken the time to make concrete suggestions on a little fic, and the fact that you have done so makes me feel like maybe I *should* try to write again. But probably not very soon, and certainly not a very long fic :)

(And I'm really supposed to be writing something else!)

Thanks again!

[khalulu]

Maybe fic writing will be a nice break from that other writing!

And, you know, there are far fewer rules for fic writing, because there are so many different styles and tastes that you can choose what you like, or what you feel up for. Follow a plot-bunny hopping down its bunny trail. See a prompt that tickles your fancy. Sometimes you can even repurpose an old prompt for a different fest. It's a supportive community here on LJ and many of us (judging from the comments) would love to read more of your fics whenever you feel so moved!

Good luck with the other writing thing. I am signing "good luck" in ASL here at my computer.... You can do it!

[snowgall]

Thank you so much!

And you're so right about LJ being a suportive community. It's really quite lovely how wonderful everyone has been. I have loved meeting you all.